* Please note that when LJ tells you that New Year's Day is my birthday, it's possibly not an accurate number and that there's no need to wish me a happy birthday then. Unless you offer me money and cake and strippers, in which case, go to it.

* THE WIZARD OF OZ and IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE are allegorical examinations of an internal journey to realization and self-discovery, expressed as fantasy stories. If you already knew that, stop asking questions about why the Wizard gives such silly gifts and why George Bailey just ends up back where he belonged Unless that’s part of your own internal journey to realization and self-discovery, of course.

* People yammer about how mean it is to tell kids that Santa Claus is real, but they say nothing about the persistent childhood myth that Christmas is celebrated by everyone around the world.

* Nowadays I rarely see an illustration of the Thing (from the Fantastic Four) and the Incredible Hulk fighting without wondering on some level if this is meant to symbolize the Troubles in Northern Ireland.

* I've said it before and I'll say it again: When tapwater is too unpleasant to drink or cook in, water itself is privatized and turned into a bottling industry. Talk about a racket...

* I didn't see any boxing on Boxing Day. Damn it.

* A friend of mine insists that I need to get active on Twitter.com, and I'm sitting there thinking, "I chose the most primitive cellphone I could find to avoid such complexities. How could I possibly do such a thing?"

* If only you would invest, we could open the first tiki-themed colonic irrigation salon: Bali Hai Colonic.

Tags: cloudminding, dithering, jibber jabber, woolgathering